What Is the Circle of Doom in Public Speaking (and How to Avoid It)
Liam Sandford
Liam Sandford is a public speaking coach, marketing leader, and 2x best-selling author, including the book Effortless Public Speaking. He helps introverted professionals and leaders take control of public speaking anxiety and use speaking to market themselves, build influence, and communicate with impact.
Every speaker knows that sinking feeling after a talk that didn’t go quite as planned. Maybe you forgot your next point, stumbled over a sentence, or caught someone in the front row checking their phone.
You replay it in your head, over and over, until that single moment becomes the story you tell yourself: ‘I’m not good at public speaking.’
That’s the Circle of Doom, a negative feedback loop that turns one imperfect moment into ongoing fear. But the truth is, it’s not your nerves or talent that hold you back. It’s what you focus on afterwards.
When you learn to break that loop and build confidence around what worked, public speaking becomes easier, lighter, and eventually effortless.
What Is the Circle of Doom?
The Circle of Doom is the cycle that begins when one bad speaking experience defines how you see yourself as a speaker. It usually starts with a single mistake, then spirals into fear and avoidance.
Here’s how it typically unfolds:
Something goes wrong while speaking.
You replay and overanalyse the mistake afterwards.
You go into your next talk trying to avoid it happening again.
The tension you feel causes the same problem to repeat.
And the more it repeats, the more you believe it defines you. That’s the Circle of Doom, a self-perpetuating loop of fear.
But the good news? It can be broken, and when it is, your confidence grows faster than you expect.
What the “Circle of Doom” Really Means for Public Speakers
The Circle of Doom doesn’t always appear overnight, it can build gradually through repetition. One difficult talk turns into a story you tell yourself, and that story becomes your internal script. Each time you speak, you’re not just facing your audience, you’re facing the memory of your last uncomfortable experience. The more you replay that story, the more power it holds. What started as one tough moment becomes a pattern of self-protection that limits your growth. Understanding that this is a learned response, not a fixed trait, is the first step toward breaking it. Once you see the pattern for what it is, you can begin replacing it with a healthier one built around progress, not perfection.
Step 1: Something Goes Wrong
Every speaker has moments that don’t go to plan. You might lose your train of thought, feel your heart race, or notice a few people looking bored.
These moments feel huge when you’re the one on stage, but most audiences barely notice. The problem isn’t the mistake, it’s what happens afterwards.
Step 2: You Reflect and Replay
After the talk, your mind replays the mistake. Instead of remembering the strong start or the moment people nodded in agreement, you zoom in on that one slip.
This isn’t a flaw in your character, it’s your brain’s negativity bias. Humans naturally give more weight to negative experiences than positive ones. It’s a survival instinct, but in public speaking, it works against you.
You might even tell yourself stories like, “I always lose my place,” “People could tell I was nervous,” or “I’m not a natural speaker.” Each replay strengthens the emotional connection to that fear.
Step 3: Fear Takes Over
When your next presentation approaches, the same memory resurfaces. You go in with one goal: don’t let that happen again.
You overprepare, script everything, or rehearse until you sound robotic. The spontaneity disappears, replaced by tension and self-consciousness.
And because your attention is focused inward, on avoiding mistakes, you lose connection with your audience. The talk feels flat or awkward, confirming your fears.
And the loop tightens.
The Hidden Trigger: Watching Yourself Back
Recording and watching yourself speak can be useful, but not when you are building confidence. Most people aren’t fair judges of themselves.
When you rewatch a talk, you don’t see the confident moments. You see the one line you stumbled over, the stroke of your hair, the slight hand movement that looked awkward. You become your own harshest critic.
A rule I share with clients is this:
If you wouldn’t give someone else the feedback, don’t give it to yourself.
You would never tell another speaker, “That pause made you look nervous,” yet you tell yourself that instantly.
Instead of rewatching, go by feeling. After your talk, take a moment to ask:
Which parts felt strong?
When did I feel the audience respond?
What moment felt natural and easy?
That instinctive “that bit went well” feeling is your best guide. It’s the beginning of success remembered, the antidote to the Circle of Doom.
The Psychology Behind the Circle of Doom
Public speaking anxiety is rarely about the present moment. It’s about memory.
When something goes wrong in front of others, your brain stores that moment as a social threat. It’s wired to protect you from humiliation or rejection, so the next time you’re in a similar situation, it floods your body with stress hormones, even before you start speaking.
That’s why your hands shake or your heart races even when you know your content perfectly. Your body isn’t reacting to the audience. It’s reacting to what happened last time.
The only way to change that pattern is through new experiences. Each time you speak and things go better, even slightly better, your brain learns that public speaking is safe again.
That’s why success remembered is so powerful. You’re not just thinking positively, you’re retraining your brain’s response to speaking.
How to Break the Circle of Doom
Breaking the Circle of Doom isn’t about ignoring your fears or pretending mistakes don’t matter, it’s about retraining how your brain interprets them. Each time you respond differently to a setback, you weaken the old loop. By writing down your fears, planning your responses, and focusing on what went well after each talk, you start shifting from threat mode to growth mode. The aim isn’t to eliminate nervousness, it’s to stop letting it define you. With each positive experience, even small ones, you build a new circle: one of confidence, reflection, and steady improvement. Over time, that becomes your natural state every time you speak.
1. Write Your Fears Down
Before your next talk, take five minutes to write down everything you’re afraid might happen. Don’t censor yourself, include it all.
Then, for each fear, write a short plan for what you would do if it happened.
Example:
Fear: I’ll forget what to say.
Plan: Pause, take a breath, check my notes, then continue.
By turning fears into scenarios with responses, you move from panic to preparation. You have already rehearsed your recovery in your head, which means your brain no longer sees it as a threat.
2. Reframe Reflection Into Feedback
After each talk, resist the temptation to analyse mistakes. Instead, ask:
What went better than last time?
Which moment felt most natural?
What feedback (verbal or non-verbal) did I get from the audience?
Write these down. Over time, you’ll see patterns in what works, and that becomes the foundation of your confidence.
This isn’t positive thinking. It’s deliberate learning. You go into your next talk building on last time rather than avoiding a repeat of last time.
3. Focus on Recovery, Not Perfection
Perfectionism is the fuel that keeps the Circle of Doom alive. Every speaker makes mistakes, even professionals. The difference is that great speakers recover smoothly.
If you lose your place, pause. If your voice shakes, smile and carry on. The audience usually doesn’t notice nearly as much as you think.
The best way to practice this? Introduce small, controlled imperfections in rehearsal. Skip a line on purpose, then recover. You will quickly learn how little it matters.
4. Start Small, Then Scale Up
Confidence grows in stages. Don’t jump from anxious to auditorium overnight.
Start with smaller, low stakes situations:
Speaking up in a meeting
Giving a short update to your team
Recording a one-minute video on your phone
Use the Nano Speech framework to make each one count:
Open: Start with a hook, a story, question, or insight.
Body: Deliver your main message with one clear point.
Close: End with a simple takeaway or call to action.
Once you feel comfortable in smaller settings, scale up to longer talks or larger audiences. This “start small, scale up” approach builds evidence that you can handle more without triggering fear.
5. Build Your Bank of Success Remembered
Confidence isn’t a feeling that appears one day, it’s something you build with every successful rep. Confidence is success remembered.
After every speaking experience, write down one moment that went well. Keep them in a journal or notes app. When doubt creeps in, read through that list.
This trains your brain to recall success instead of replaying fear. Over time, the Circle of Doom weakens, and confidence becomes your default state.
Why the Circle of Doom Feels So Hard to Escape
Breaking the Circle of Doom feels tough because it goes against your instincts. Your brain’s goal is safety, not growth. It thinks, “That talk hurt last time, let’s avoid that again.”
But avoidance teaches your brain that the threat is real. Speaking again teaches it that you’re safe.
That’s why progress comes from repetition, not retreat. Each time you speak, you send a new message to your brain: I can do this.
And if you focus on small wins each time, you will find your confidence grows steadily, not suddenly.
A Common Scenario
This is a common scenario I see with my coaching clients.
You gave a presentation at work that didn’t land well. You forgot your next slide, stumbled over a key point, and spent the rest of the day replaying it in your mind.
The next time you present, you overprepare. You script every word. But when one thing goes off script, you freeze, which is exactly what you feared.
That’s the Circle of Doom in action.
Now imagine if you had written down your fears, planned how to handle them, and gone into that next presentation focusing only on what worked last time.
Maybe your opening was strong. Maybe your story landed well. You build on those successes, and the cycle reverses.
That’s how confidence compounds.
Turn the Circle of Doom Into a Circle of Growth
Every speaker experiences doubt. The difference between confident speakers and anxious ones isn’t what happens to them, it’s how they respond.
If you focus on mistakes, you repeat fear.
If you focus on progress, you repeat confidence.
Here’s the shift:
Old loop: Mistake → Overanalysis → Fear → Repetition
New loop: Success → Reflection → Confidence → Progress
Once you build your speaking experiences around small wins and recovery, you will find that fear fades naturally, not because you forced it away, but because you replaced it with something stronger.
FAQs About the Circle of Doom in Public Speaking
What is the Circle of Doom in simple terms?
It’s the pattern of overthinking one bad speaking experience until it shapes all future ones. You focus on avoiding mistakes instead of sharing your message.
How do I stop being my own harshest critic?
Use the rule: if you wouldn’t say it to someone else, don’t say it to yourself. Go by how the talk felt, not by what you looked or sounded like.
Should I record myself speaking?
Only when your confidence is already stable. If you’re rebuilding, don’t record yourself and instead focus on remembering moments that felt strong or connected instead.
How can I calm down before speaking?
Write down your fears, plan how you’d handle each one, and remind yourself of three things that went well last time. This shifts your brain from threat to readiness.
What’s the fastest way to rebuild speaking confidence?
Start small, use the Nano Speech framework for short talks, and record your progress through success remembered. Small wins stack up fast.
You Are Not Defined by One Talk
Every speaker has moments that don’t go to plan. The mistake isn’t what defines you, it’s the meaning you attach to it.
You can either let one talk reinforce fear, or use it to build awareness and growth.
Confidence doesn’t come from avoiding mistakes. It comes from knowing you can handle them, calmly, clearly, and with a smile.
That’s how you break the Circle of Doom and step into Effortless Public Speaking. If you want to lean more about rebuilding your public speaking confidence, check out the Ultimate Guide to Public Speaking.
TL;DR: Understanding and Breaking the Circle of Doom
The Circle of Doom is the cycle where one bad speaking experience creates fear, and that fear repeats in future presentations. You can break it and build confidence with these steps:
Recognize the pattern. Understand that one mistake doesn’t define you, and the fear is learned, not permanent.
Focus on what went well. After every talk, note moments that worked, rather than replaying errors.
Write down your fears and plan. Preparing responses for what might go wrong reduces anxiety and gives you control.
Start small, scale up. Use the Nano Speech framework for short, low pressure talks before moving to bigger stages.
Prioritise recovery over perfection. Mistakes happen. How you respond shapes your audience’s experience and your confidence.
More From Liam Sandford
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