Leverage the Power of Quiet Communication

Speaking
Written By Liam Sandford

How do you feel about promoting yourself? Most people hate it. It feels awkward, cringey, and you worry other people will think badly about you as a result.

Some people do it anyway, and they are loud about letting everyone know what they are doing. It’s the culture of ‘have you been to the gym if you haven’t posted about it on Instagram?’ This is what I consider the nonsense culture. Telling people you did it makes it less impressive that you did it.

Being loud or extroverted has become a promoted trait in western society compared to being more reserved or introverted. But being an extrovert is not better than being an introvert. Being an introvert isn’t better either, it is just different.

Don’t assume loud people are always great communicators. Don’t assume quiet people can’t communicate. It isn’t the case.

‘A man of few words’

In the early parts of my career I was labeled ‘a man of few words.’

What initially came across as something negative turned out to be a great strength. I was very selective with my words. If it did not add value, I simply would not say it. Generally speaking, I am one of the biggest introverts you could ever meet, and often I am the quietest person in the room.

As the quiet person in the room, little did they know that public speaking was a skill I had practiced, fine-tuned, and figured out, until they heard me deliver a presentation.

Being ‘a man of few words’ meant I was straight to the point and gave a very clear message that everyone could easily follow. It became clear that value comes from the words you use rather than the number of words you say, and this is a skill not everybody has.

Following that presentation, I became the ‘go to’ person for presentation advice in the office.

Inbound vs outbound

If you think about inbound vs outbound marketing you are probably more comfortable with one. Inbound marketing generates brand awareness and starts building trust with people first. It is a quieter approach and in the long term is more successful. If we take this approach into the creator economy, there are two types of creator:

  • The inbound creator — relies on producing great content which as a result attracts people to their products and services. This is a quiet communication approach.

  • The outbound creator — relies on sending cold messages in order to close a sale for their products and services. This is a loud communication approach.

Both might be helpful in a creator or marketing context. Using both together might be a great approach too, but inbound must be a part of success.

You might be wondering what this has to do with anything. Deliver, deliver, deliver. Let your results speak for themselves. With an outbound approach you run the risk of ‘bragging’ or taking the credit for other people’s work in attempt to look better. A solely outbound approach to your communication rubs people up the wrong way. Output matters more than being seen to be busy. In playing long term games inbound is the way.

Promoting you or promoting the idea?

You are uncomfortable promoting yourself because you don’t want to be front and center of attention. Something doesn’t feel right about it. But what if instead you were not promoting yourself but instead promoting an idea.

Don’t shy away from promoting ideas that might help people. Sure, you are attached to your idea but you are not your idea. Separate the two an steer into the ideas bucket. You will instantly feel more comfortable.

In a public speaking context, your presentation is not about you, it’s about your idea. And your idea is presented and designed to be landed with your audience. How you manage yourself is important, but public speaking is not about you at all.

Next time you feel uncomfortable promoting yourself or delivering a presentation, remove yourself from the idea. It is about the idea, it is for the audience.

Actionable takeaways

  • If you are naturally introverted steer into your clarity of message. Saying more does not add more value — use your quiet approach to your advantage.

  • Use the inbound approach. Deliver first, talk about it second. Rather than talk about it first and then never deliver.

  • Remove yourself from the ‘promotion’. You are promoting the idea and that helps people. You are not promoting yourself.

More from me

Liam Sandford
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